A colleague recently asked a group of us to share the name of our best manager. I thought back through my work history to the days when I had a boss -- before I became an independent consultant. As I reflected, I realized that even my best managers have not been very effective. I've learned a lot of lessons about what not to do from them. Now, I have the privilege of sharing those lessons with my consulting clients who are corporate leaders, executives and business owners.
BAD BOSSES AND WHAT I'VE LEARNED FROM THEM:
The boss who can't keep a confidence. This is the individual who gains your trust, talks to you openly about her life, and invites you to share openly about yours. She assures you that anything you tell her, particularly deeply personal things, will remain confidential. However, you later hear colleagues repeating the information that you only told to that one person. Trust diminishes immediately. Even if that boss is effective in every other area of management, the new knowledge that you can't trust them permanently affects your relationship. That trust is really tough to rebuild. The lesson: Listen, show empathy, and then keep it to yourself. No matter how juicy the tidbit of information is, don't share it. Also, keep in mind when you tell Jim and Jane things that Sally told you in confidence, Jim and Jane learn that they can't trust you either. So it's bigger than just one person and one relationship.
The passive boss. One manager of mine would not deal with performance issues head-on. He was a nice guy. He cared alot about his employees and didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. So when a staff member was not performing well, receiving poor feedback from customers and more, the boss did nothing about it. Team members and peers brought the issues to his attention as well. Over the course of a whole year nothing was done. An underperforming staff member is a burden to the rest of the team. Everyone else's workload increases. Additionally, it sets the precedent that poor performance is ok. The reputation of the entire team (including the boss) could be negatively affected as well. The lesson: Don't be passive or passive-aggressive regarding performance issues. Talk to the employee respectful. Giving feedback is an effort to help. Present the evidence -- customer comments, reports, missed deadlines, inaccuracies, etc. Develop a plan for that person's improvement and get their ideas as well for how they might improve. Incorporate those ideas into the plan where possible.
The indecisive manager. This manager was eager to gain employee input and ideas, which was great. Employees felt included and appreciated. However, after all the ideas were gathered and all the possibilities were explored, nothing got done. The things we talked about and agreed upon were not executed, which left the team feeling that the boss was all talk and no action. The lesson: When you're having trouble making a decision, write down three alternatives. Then jot down the pros and cons of each of them including the risks and costs. Use that data to figure out which option would be most beneficial and move forward with the decision. Announce it to your team explaining how you reached that conclusion and work with them to develop a plan for execution. Give credit to those who generated the ideas.
The griping manager. In an effort to be accepted and included, this manager often shared her feelings with her staff. I imagine she wanted to find ways to connect with us. She griped about her boss. She complained about her workload. She even questioned company policies. Instead of being the voice of the company, she become the voice of disillusionment. The lesson: Share your complaints and frustrations at home with your family and friends. You may think of your staff members as friends but you are still their boss. Don't give in to the temptation to join in on gossip or gripe sessions. In fact, help others understand the 'whys' behind corporate decisions. Let them vent while you support and defend the direction of the business.
The absentee manager. From what my colleagues tell me, this is a pretty common one. My absentee manager didn't have a single performance-related, strategy planning, or goal setting conversation with me in three years. He was out of the office a lot but that was not the problem. The problem was he was absent from his managerial responsibilities. The lesson: As a leader, you have an obligation to develop your people, provide them with support, and make sure they understand expectations. You should take the ensure they have the information and resources they need to meet their goals. Frequent open dialogues are key; even if they are conducted via instant message or phone. If you are traveling, have those meetings in the airport, hotel, or coffee shops. Your staff will appreciate your effort.
BAD BOSSES AND WHAT I'VE LEARNED FROM THEM:
The boss who can't keep a confidence. This is the individual who gains your trust, talks to you openly about her life, and invites you to share openly about yours. She assures you that anything you tell her, particularly deeply personal things, will remain confidential. However, you later hear colleagues repeating the information that you only told to that one person. Trust diminishes immediately. Even if that boss is effective in every other area of management, the new knowledge that you can't trust them permanently affects your relationship. That trust is really tough to rebuild. The lesson: Listen, show empathy, and then keep it to yourself. No matter how juicy the tidbit of information is, don't share it. Also, keep in mind when you tell Jim and Jane things that Sally told you in confidence, Jim and Jane learn that they can't trust you either. So it's bigger than just one person and one relationship.
The passive boss. One manager of mine would not deal with performance issues head-on. He was a nice guy. He cared alot about his employees and didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. So when a staff member was not performing well, receiving poor feedback from customers and more, the boss did nothing about it. Team members and peers brought the issues to his attention as well. Over the course of a whole year nothing was done. An underperforming staff member is a burden to the rest of the team. Everyone else's workload increases. Additionally, it sets the precedent that poor performance is ok. The reputation of the entire team (including the boss) could be negatively affected as well. The lesson: Don't be passive or passive-aggressive regarding performance issues. Talk to the employee respectful. Giving feedback is an effort to help. Present the evidence -- customer comments, reports, missed deadlines, inaccuracies, etc. Develop a plan for that person's improvement and get their ideas as well for how they might improve. Incorporate those ideas into the plan where possible.
The indecisive manager. This manager was eager to gain employee input and ideas, which was great. Employees felt included and appreciated. However, after all the ideas were gathered and all the possibilities were explored, nothing got done. The things we talked about and agreed upon were not executed, which left the team feeling that the boss was all talk and no action. The lesson: When you're having trouble making a decision, write down three alternatives. Then jot down the pros and cons of each of them including the risks and costs. Use that data to figure out which option would be most beneficial and move forward with the decision. Announce it to your team explaining how you reached that conclusion and work with them to develop a plan for execution. Give credit to those who generated the ideas.
The griping manager. In an effort to be accepted and included, this manager often shared her feelings with her staff. I imagine she wanted to find ways to connect with us. She griped about her boss. She complained about her workload. She even questioned company policies. Instead of being the voice of the company, she become the voice of disillusionment. The lesson: Share your complaints and frustrations at home with your family and friends. You may think of your staff members as friends but you are still their boss. Don't give in to the temptation to join in on gossip or gripe sessions. In fact, help others understand the 'whys' behind corporate decisions. Let them vent while you support and defend the direction of the business.
The absentee manager. From what my colleagues tell me, this is a pretty common one. My absentee manager didn't have a single performance-related, strategy planning, or goal setting conversation with me in three years. He was out of the office a lot but that was not the problem. The problem was he was absent from his managerial responsibilities. The lesson: As a leader, you have an obligation to develop your people, provide them with support, and make sure they understand expectations. You should take the ensure they have the information and resources they need to meet their goals. Frequent open dialogues are key; even if they are conducted via instant message or phone. If you are traveling, have those meetings in the airport, hotel, or coffee shops. Your staff will appreciate your effort.
